You all said i am changing?yes...i admitted since long time ago...actually we all changed, we are growing from a teenager into an adult...we meet different people at different stage...the environment, pressure makes us changing...you all didn't changed?we know better than others...we are all changed...later i will show you all what i've change...
1. i like to complain people and yet i act close to them? what does the complain mean? i, myself is a bad temper girl...all the world know very well...i may hurt people when i am getting mad...because i may scold the people instantly infront of her/him...so people may hate...this one i know...so that's why i am trying hard to take-off this bad behavior...like what i did to you last time...but i am better than the people who like to hate behind people...actually who you mentioned is just talking yourself too...why you complained me at my back and infront of jinjin??? (saying i am asking to much question) you hate me why are you pretending like there is nothing happening...?when i raise the problem yet you deny there is no problem...but now you said it's too late?why not you come and tell me : angie, i abit beh syok when you are asking me so many questions...? that is the problem...you keep yourself silent...so end up you are suffering to most...because i doesn't know what is thinking in your mind...so i will just repeating do the same thing...as time getting longer the more you hate me...you know?when a person unwilling to do something...the body language and the way they communicate will be different...you, yourself won't realise...but the one who you unlike may feel it, jinjin feel it too right?...but she want to act close to the person although she knew there is something wrong?because she doesn't know why the reasons you hate her...you never speak to her how you feel...the best thing she can do is treat it as normal...continue friend or even closer to you...as she closer to you...now, another problem created...you may think she is FAKE!!! you got the reasons to hate her so there are much more reasons you will give to yourself to say : ' wow...she is so fake...why want to make herself close to me and laugh like nothing is going on?' so you said she is FAKE.... so now i say to you...i close to anyone doesn't mean i am acting infront of he/she...what i do is to make the big problem become small problem...small problem become no problem...as i know, if i raise out the problem, war may begin...so this time i made the wrong decision...which to speak out the problem...i want to know the problem, your feeling...but yet not to create problem...i bet if that night i didn't ask : is there a problem between us? then today we will still friend like last time,,,but the distance between you and me with get farer...i am so regret until today seriously...i didn't hate anyone at back, when i feel there is something wrong...i will speak out directly...you said i like to complain people but still close to her/him...i've explained sincerely from my heart...before you said this sentence, are you sure you are not talking yourself too?you beh syok me but still close to me?
2. You said i like to talking behind people instead of talk to the people? this is the big misunderstanding to you...i didn't talking behind you, that day when i am in need...i sent message to you three...you(YY) replied me you are busy today...so can't help me...then i ask jinjin to help...she said she not free too...she ask me YY can't help me?i just replied her : she said she is not free today...then i explained to her...i really need help and i very need the car...so i only bring trouble to you all...because i know you all have your own thing to do...(this is so-called i blame you didn't help me?) i know i've bring lots of trouble to you all so sometime i am quite shame to ask help from you all...so i said message is just typing by using words...the same sentence may intepret wrong...and got the wrong meanings...for example: 'good la you...!' how you feel toward this sentence? some may intepret as you are angry...but actually it's a greeting sentence...so that's why many misunderstand happened...and i very appreciate what you three helped me...i missed to write them in the blog is not because i didn't appreciate...the reason is i seldom online...i've no chance to post what i want to write in time...when there is a chance,it's also controlled by time due to i've to went to CC to online...there are so much thing to write...i appreciated in the heart...i remember until forever...i've no budget now so i cant make anything like treat you a lunch or what...i promised myself i will do that as soon as i get the loan...if i write it out then i forgot which one seem appreciate the most?ok...the comment you given was : depends on you lor...so?what is the actual answer you give?everytime i ask you give the same...that day, jinjin said they all didn't ask you(YY) question is due to you often don't know make decision too...when the first somebody tell me this...then i won't ask you anymore...because i know it's quite a disturbance to you...so i am here to say sorry to you(YY)...
3. You are wrong...if i am the person who you decribed...i should have many FAKE friends in F1 until F6...due to i can acting close with them although i hate them...and i won't go bully ang see see in the class anyhow...我不是一个耍手段的人...
4. I ask my bf reply kent's message in FB... but isn't i replied it please...i am not that silly...dennis got his psp...he can online at anywhere on anytime...And that day he went to CC to reply kent while he is waiting customer at bm as i requested him to to so...please don't make myself laugh at myself...
5.The answer is the same in NO.1 and NO.3...
6. Wow...after this war, i realised everything you all helped me are not sincerely from heart...i went go with you all is because i am trying to take advantage from you all?if that time i didn't sprained my leg...i will still go out with you all...and i will make myself as pretty as i can...when the time you all date me, i just answer i don't have car...so i can't join you all...but afterthat i think if i stay at usm then jinjin can come to pick me then don't need drop me back to farlim...actually, that night you all didn't drop me at usm, my aunt will drop me at usm in the next morning...why i don't want stay at my own house to settle my love quarrel?
7. If i like to add salt add vinegar when convey something then the friendship between you 3 won't maintain until today...i can break any of the friendship on anytime if i want...so i am not that bad as you all think...maybe you all may disagree what i said...but it's true from my heart...
In the past, i will scold bad words, make anger to you all as i angry...but now, why i should cry?for you...i acting pity?should i do this?my eye won't pain?i won't become ugly in the next morning with the panda eye?i won't cry fake infront of anyone...image to me is very important, why should i make myself ugly?i admitted i easy to cry but all my tears are containing emotion...last few days i cried is because i really upset...i sad to all the thing you send me in the message...i cried in the toilet, after i clean myself only back into room...everyone can see my eye...they are not blind...why should i acting infront of them?they don't know you...even know you...there are no reasons for me to do so...
you may deny this war is not because of BF...but your heart is clearer than others...
AND ONE MORE THING...I DIDN'T SEE YOU AT THE PC FAIR...BUT DENNIS DID...HE TOLD ME AFTER PASS BY YOUR PLACE...IS YOUR ACTION MAKE ME REALISE YOU ARE THERE...
Anyway, there is nothing for me to showing-off to you all...you all have the better than me...
Yayee: your bf can come to you anytime when you need...but i can't...you can see your bf as you miss him but i can't....you've all better than me...your car, your family backgrounds , you are richer than me and why should i show-off??there is nothing for me to show-off!!!
ChinChin: my bf is a working people like your bf so they can't reach us instantly when we need them...so what he helped me you all can't see...
i just post something normal in the post already get the word ' showing-off '...if i really write down everything that my bf helped me in this 3 years then the greater show-off will be commented on me...
I know you are on fire so you may say something hurt...so do i...so i said sorry to you and kent...
seriously, let you commented as a FAKER... i really make big laugh for a few minutes..i use my heart to treat my best friend and end up with the word FAKE!!! why this word will come out with your mind...this is because you all didn't follow what you all promised...' there's no secret between us ' ...so if you beh syok one of the four will keep in the heart...and hates her in the heart...so you said ' it's too late when i realised that is problem...if i am the faker...i will call seanx, call everyone that you(YY) know and i know to tell them i am how much get hurt already AND act pity infront of her already...
I am still the same angie...i changed to accept people's weakness...i know everyone is not perfect...and i am controlling my bad behavior - bad temper...i am here to sorry to you 3...i always did something wrong when i get mad...
& that day, when my car got problem...i am so touch you are willing to help me when i ask for help...but it's not true...i found out you complained behind me...i said the words : nevermind, i see got other people else can help me or not... if not you only follow me to the shop...
this sentence you misunderstand again...why i want to say like that?because i feel shame to ask you help me...my bf couldn't reach me on the spot when i need him...because he is working at BM...i feel shy to ask you and your bf to help me...he is your bf...how much i envy your bf can stand by your side anytime when you need or don't need...so, i not sure you are free or not...that's why i trying hard to find others help...if possible there are somebody else can help me...i can give a reason to myself not to depend on you and your bf...you won't understand the feeling in my heart...
when everything happened i got my own reasons...like that day, why i insisted not to go eat western food with you all?please doesnt mean i not love you all or i want to spend my dinner with my bf...the big reason is i don't have money...so i don't want spoilt your plan but go home eat fried rice ALONE...
you said what you mentioned in the letter is because you understand me?...no...you didn't understand me but make misunderstanding in fact...you may say i am denying...if you throw me to the hell i will still saying the same...i am not lying in this post or acting...i am not that bad as you all think...what i did are all care my friends, my families...and all i did bring troubles to my ownself...is really too bad...
anyway...all i written here are all from my heart...different people may have different views...you may not agree what i mentioned or what i explained...you will think i am FAKE again perhaps...for me, it's hard to build up a friendship...especially among four of us...i really don't hope our relationship will end just like this...it's unworth...why there are so much people in the world but we must meet together at certain place in certain time?it's all about fate...this time it's not a war...for me, is a misunderstand...we are come from different backgrounds, different lifestyle, different environment...so 难免会有误会...i want this friendship to be continued doesnt mean i don't have other friends or i want to take advantage from you all in future...there are nothing i can get from you all except cares & loves...is all because i appreciate all of you...a very last sorry to all of you...and thank you for spending your time to read through this post...
i've deleted your(YY) message and the post in fb...sorry for everything...
